Friday, July 20, 2007

It's Friday, I'm in Love

with love.

Perhaps it is the alignment of HPV [the movie, people - and yes, I saw it for a second time last night and yes, I spent a fair bit of the remaining night rereading HPVI in a red and gold scarf I knitted for the occasion and no, I don't have a boyfriend] and HPVII (the book). Perhaps it is the fact that my mother's cell went dead on her week long trip to visit relatives in the "resort" town of Galveston, Texas. Perhaps it is because the first OU game's like a month away or something and I've got tickets. Perhaps it is hearing from long lost friends. Perhaps it is sleeping with my windows wide open. Perhaps it is because I had a dream where I was actually on Red Eye. Perhaps it's knowing someone else loves to hate on Dean Blevins as much as me. Perhaps it is the impending visit of my great aunt and uncle who are driving down from Tulsa to distribute their emu oil, because yeah, my relatives run an emu ranch, to Dodson's Health Foods. Perhaps it is the word "incontrovertible," which I am really enjoying right now. Perhaps it is because I have pretty decent eyebrows that require little plucking (although, I do none) because I have enough other things to worry about. Perhaps it is the grand opening of Sooner Mall's Forever 21 (aka Hooker's R Us - or in my case, me). Perhaps it is tomorrow's farmers market. Perhaps it's tonight's drink that I will get all by myself like an adult at a bar after work because I am a grown up and can do things like that if I want.

But mostly, it's this fucking song that is making my robot heart leak oil like Lohan leaks drool when she passes out in Samantha Ronson's car. Fuck you Old 97's and your Zach Braffian ways into my heart.

35 comments:

Julie_Gong said...

How sweet was HPV?!?

LADY BONER!

The [Cherry] Ride said...

HPV was awesome.

What, no mention of "tacocake?"

5 of 9er said...

I'm seeing it tonight... but I doubt I'll get a lady boner. Hmmmm.

Love sleeping with the windows open - good call!

TK said...

That is a great song.

Swell. Just what I needed, another band to obsessively research and then gorge myself on. Thanks.

Alex said...

wizard fighting = awesome. matt and i didn't not have a 30 minute discussion on what was going to happen in the last book by the way. it was pretty sweet. because we aren't children. and im glad you like the Old 97s because i was under the impression that you did not.

Clinton said...

My friend Joel had that song in his wedding.

Also, Galvestion? Ew. I have relatives from there and they make your average disgusting white trash look like the Kennedy clan by comparison.

Jess said...

Shit, I have a lady boner at the idea of going to see HPV tonight. Which I am totally doing.

I heart Old 97's.

stewpid said...

Theory: Forever 21 is Ground Zero for bejewelled orange skanks.

Prove or disprove. WITH CAMERA PHONE PICS.

Mr. Shain said...

seriously i dont get it. HPI-V have all sucked balls. didn't anyone notice? and the books are so hot themselves.

my mom told me i remind her of zach braff. or maybe he reminds her of me. either way, weird.

Mr. Shain said...

(insert "not" in above comment between "are" and "so")

blythe said...

lady boners, tacocakes and HPV! oh my!

seriously, though, question is melting my heart. that i didn't know i had. when you propose to me (you know who you are, ira glass), this needs to be playing in the background. perhaps with a zach braff monologue. interesting. zach braff vs. ira glass monologue.

yeah. galveston blows balls. when they stock your room with special tar removal wipes, you know you're in trouble.

and stwepid, you are so on!

you mom knows zach braff?

Alex said...

i'm on my mom's computer right now and half the things on the page are in chinese. it's pretty sweet. just thought you should know that. maybe you didn't forget as much as you thought. or maybe it just translates it all. it's science.

shain: a few years ago, i would have agreed with you on HP, but i drank the kool-aid. perhaps my mind is weak. or maybe i have an inappropriate crush on emma watson. i'll slowly back out of the room now.

Garrett Reid said...

All of these "lady boner" comments are freaking me out.

blythe said...

know what freaks me out? the fact that you won't tell me how you know wampus, et al.

and lady boner. i can write it, but i'm not sure i can say it out loud. kind of like moist.

d said...

omg. you hate the word moist? i swear we were separated at birth or something.

The [Cherry] Ride said...

Ripping on HP is so 2004. Get over it and embrace the love, Mr. Shain.

Blythe - lemme know once you've designed and produced the TacoCake t-shirts. I'll buy one in every color.

blythe said...

things to do this weekend:

1. take pictures of orange skanks at forever 21. preferably in heels with giant beaded necklaces.

2. search records to see if d (and c-dog, too - triplets?) and i were in fact separated at birth.

3. make "tacocake" t-shirts for cherry. i'm pretty sure you could search "tacocake" on youporn.com and come up with some pretty rad, i mean weird stuff.

4. try to get mr. shain to understand love. i think that's more than a weekend project.

JebusHChrist said...

Moist, liquid, and fluid are all terms I can live without.

Question - If you have an emu ranch is it acceptable to dress as a cowboy? If so, are they looking for a ranch hand (I'm very sturdy)?

Mr. Shain said...

it's going on 12 years and i haven't seen much progress.

Mr. Shain said...

jesus we're old... well not as old as [cherry] but still, old in a non-geriatric sort of way.

blythe said...

correction (i first typed "correctio" which is obvioulsy wizardspeak for correction - drinking + waiting for the new book = fun/lame) YOU are old. i am still a young 25 (well, for two more weeks exactly or something don't forget to send me my gift from whorepresents.com).

wait, what's going on for 12 years with little progress? wait, is that how long we've known each other? fuckin' a.

blythe said...

oh and jebus, they're always hiring. thing is, cowboy regalia is not an option, it's a requirement (full on wranglers, justin boots, carhartt jacket). also, you have to live on their compound out in the middle of nowhere with my second cousins or whoever they are - in spite of exchanging cards and gifts on major (christian) holidays for the past 25 years, i couldn't tell you their names. but yeah, i'll send you an application.

Jeannette said...

You blog well, but the real meat-n-potatoes of your site is in the comments section.

I TOTALLY WANNA TAKE PICTURES OF FOREVER 21 SKANKS!

That's the most fun idea Ive ever heard. Maybe I'll bring a date.

blythe said...

(and don't think for a second that i won't at least try to take some pictures of sorostitutes in the wild this weekend. i will do my best david attenborough.)

is it midnight yet? this anticipation is exhausting. or maybe it's all the porn. beer me!

Dan said...

Is it possible for a man to have a lady boner? I think I have one right now.

blythe said...

CISCO!

Dan said...

no you didn't. that'll give you a gentleman's boner.

jayniek said...

holy shit, that song rules.

JebusHChrist said...

Will there be a saloon with whiskey, cards, and fluffy-breasted hooker named Mae? That's the kinda thing I was looking for.
Also, I get to wear the black hat.

blythe said...

dan - gentleman's boner? no such thing.

janiek - it does, no?

jebus - bad news. there's a trailer with some bud, a nintendo (old school - none of that new fangled stuff) and a hooker named, well, it rhymes with blythe (ok, it's me). hey, gotta pay those student loans somehow!

JebusHChrist said...

Nintendo? I'll take it!

JebusHChrist said...

Oh yeah, the hooker sounds good too!

Dan said...

not all boners are impolite.

blythe said...

again - i'm not so sure.

we should be out! i am out WITH my computer. does that count?

Dan said...

mmm, sad.

mmm, sad.