Monday, June 25, 2007

Sofa King We Todd Did

I start a new job this week. A real one. With benefits and everything. I hope that I will have several hours for unfettered internetting, but I can only hope. They might expect me to do stuff. Basically, I think the ol' blog's going to suffer. Just a warning. Oh wait. Too late.

In my last day of freedom, I am doing productive things like eating Spaghettios, watching Entourage and Flight of the Conchords (still funny!) and trying to keep my head from exploding. I flipped to Comedy Central to see if I was lucky enough to catch an episode of Mad TV, but instead encountered a commercial for the Fishpen™. For a second I thought I was still drunk, but apparently this is for real. It's so mindblowingly fucktarded, I can't even devise some snarky rant about it. Of course, I want one for my briefcase. You get two for $39.99 (+ shipping and handling), so I'll give the other one to the first person to send me a MySpace friend request.*

This is a picture of my dog thinking about how stupid the Fishpen™ is.

Know what else is stupid? The O'Reilly Factor. But we all know that. I love to hate Fox, but this relationship has become complicated as I am absolutely obsessed with Red Eye (and in love with Bill Schulz, but who isn't - here is a sample of this crap fest), so sometimes I search the internets for Fox related news droppings. Today I found the following. It's spectacular. Jesse Lange, you are right up there with Michael Cera on my list of inappropriate crushes.



*This will not actually happen. I need two.

22 comments:

Mr. Shain said...

god, you really need that job.

blythe said...

i know, right?

alabra said...

so what exactly is this alleged job? i'll believe it when i get office stationery sent to my house.

NathanWind said...

ill be honest, when i speed-read through your post io thought you said you had an inappropriate ctuch on jessica lange. then i thought about it. what's inappropriate about subtle grace? her jawline alone is cause for a parade. im half a cup of warm milk away from having nocturnal emissions about her 'making' love to gary/jake busey in the ball pit at chuck e. cheese. god you're a weirdo.

NathanWind said...

im an awesome typist

Alex said...

there will be no snarky remark about the fishpen. and if by fucktarded you mean fucktardedly, punch your dog in the teeth brilliant then you'd be right. stealth fishing. it's totally the new hotness. and yes. i just said new hotness. deal with it.

blythe said...

alabra - ouch. maybe i'll even get my own card!

matt - i think all of the jessica lange jawline parades were last week. maybe next year.

alex - sorry, buddy. the fishpen is dumb.

The Mighty Horse said...

I've seen two chicks make out, a rodent trun in dramaitc fashon, dogs wearing sunglasses, a man eat his own head, and my own cock, all in the same day, however, none of them compare to the unbridled un-fucking-believableness (sp) that is the fishpen(tm). In fact if the fishpen(tm) were a woman, i would want to be inside the fishpen(tm).

The Mighty Horse said...

*fashion

Alex says "You're wrong, whore!!111!"

G said...

you got a job? that is BOSS.

Boss, I say. Congrats!!

Mr. Shain said...

can court-ordered community service really be called a job, blythe?

The Mighty Horse said...

I finally posted as per your request. You had better blog roll me now.

The [Cherry] Ride said...

Man, you have some weird commenters.

blythe said...

i know. they're worse in person, trust me. be glad you live far, far away. and thanks. you know why.

NathanWind said...

cherry ride called you a man. ha! face!

Alex said...

if that was supposed to be an insult, i will not acknowledge it, or respond to it.

Julie_Gong said...

I'll trade something for that fish pen. Something really good. I swear!

blythe said...

nathan - yeah, he did.

alex - i kid!

julie - deal.

Winter said...

so funny.

blythe said...

thanks. i hope you are not being sarcastic. which is ok, i guess, but will probably hurt my feelings a little.

stewpid said...

I'm obsessed with doggysteps.com

Colleen said...

Wow, fishing is really easy with the Fishpen™! I don't fish, but I think I should get this for tricking people. Like, put a dollar on the end. Then: YOINK!