Monday, August 06, 2007

Cringesday on a Monday: Birthday that never ends edition!

Hey everybody, come and see how good I look! -- Ron Burgundy

I've never really been on the receiving end of a digital gift before, but this year, I got four! I will share three with you because one was deeply personal and quite filthy. One is cringe-worthy, one is a direct Cringesday contribution, and one is, well, I need your help with the last thing.

* Click here for more. You'll have to download it (it's a power point). This is as blog savvy as I get and I had to have help.

http://internetisapropernoun.net/the_history_of_birthdays.png

* Click here only if you want to ROTLFLMAO like a LOTR NAACP AARP CBS. Siobhlogger's outdone herself. Cringesday GOLD! Here is a preview.


* This was sent to me by someone that I don't know all that well, yet he somehow managed to distill my entire personality into 30 seconds and some graphics. So, do I marry him or file a restraining order because he's clearly stalking me? Which is sexy, of course.


29 comments:

dmbmeg said...

That dog frightens me.

JebusHChrist said...

The number of Dr Pepper cans frightens me. It's like the photo was sponsored by DP. Did Michael Bay take that picture?

Annie said...

That just prompted me to open PPT for the very first time! My computer even asked me if I was "sure" I wanted to do this. That was cute. It's truly horrifying to look at pics your parents took of you before dances. The combo of "This is so awkward" and "I think I look stupid" coming from both ends of the camera. It's making me shudder. Also, I spied a Mr. Shain!

Julie_Gong said...

wtf was that? possibly the greatest thing ever?

Grace said...

BLYYYYYYYYYYYYYTHE HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I LOVE YOU!

blythe said...

dmb - she's claire! best dog in the world! and, totally scary. it's the carrot.

jebus - weren't you ever in 9th grade? what did you subsist on if not DP? don't tell me pepsi. that will shatter my entire image of you.

annie - i know! most of them you can see the i'm gonna get t-rashed 5 minutes after you get this camera out of my face in my eyes. or at least get some ass in the backseat of a car. fun times!

julie - i'm not sure which you are referring to since they could all be described in that manner. but if it's what i think it is, i am in agreement.

grace - thanks g-diddy.

JebusHChrist said...

Lots and lots of vegamite.

CrimeNotes said...

That Power Point set? It's great. It made me nostalgic for something, but I'm not sure why and for what.

I'm now going to cry quietly while I reflect on the transience of youth.

d said...

1. awesome
2. awesome
3. kind of creepy. restraining order? yes. definitely.

JebusHChrist said...

See, I thought it would be a little creepy to download that Power Point set and watch it. Now I'm thinking I'm missing out...

Matt said...

As I sit on a conference bridge waiting for the meeting to start, I flip through this masterpiece of powerpoint and listen to a muzak version of "Ain't No Sunshine When She's Gone." Pan flute. Bongo drums. Synthesizer. Where do they find this stuff?

And I'm reminded of how different our lives were back then. Although I'm not in any of the pictures, I remember how we all were back then, and it's hard to believe it was almost 10 years ago. That picture of all the AEGIS girls must have been at Kathy's house. Remember the superlatives on our trophies? I came in a close second to the junior Chris Scaperlanda. I'd like to think that in the last 10 years I have surpassed him in that area. (Although his diploma from ND might trump mine from Mike Vick's alma matter.)

Anyway, I'm glad I could help you share this with everyone. I'm very disappointed that Gabon was not included in the MUN slides. Or Slovakia. After 10 years, you're all still elitists. But I'm no exception.

Matt said...

RE: the guy next to Brice. I believe that would be the Patrick Hargis, from the junior class. It looks like a rubber swimming cap viking helmet replete with long locks of braided hair and... a dildo? Having known Patrick for awhile, I can't imagine it being anyone else.

I also see Frazier and Kindell in the background. Not sure what Matt's doing. Air guitar?

blythe said...

jebus - are you secretly australian? if so, i secretly love you. if not, i openly love vegemite.

crimenotes - your blurb: i made crimenotes cry!

d - agreed, but still kind of intruiguing.

jebus - watch it and weep, apparently. or laugh hysterically, which is what i did. but that's because it was about me. ME!

matt - i know, those were the days, eh? we were so young and beautiful. or naive and average looking. whichever. reunion! and this time you should come.

p.s. is matt ever doing anything besides playing air guitar? oh yes, playin guitar hero.

dmbmeg said...

Where is Mr. Shain?

Dear Shain,
We need you. Hell, I need you. I'm a mess without you. I miss you so damn much. I miss being with you, I miss being near you. I miss your laugh. I miss your scent; I miss your musk. When this all gets sorted out, I think you and me should get an apartment together.

Love,
Me.

blythe said...

i think he's in milwaukee. remember that part in wayne's world when alice cooper launches into his speech about historical mi-li-waukee? god i love that movie. incidentally, my freshman roommate's boyfriend refers to me as "blythe algar." apparently, i am garth-like, which i assume is awesome and sexy and smart and all that stuff, but really suspect it means dorky with weird hair.

JebusHChrist said...

Not Australian, but my appetite is.

If I watch it will there be pictures of Mr. Shain for me to mock?

blythe said...

ah ha. then i openly love vegemite.

and yes, there is a lovely picture of mr. shain. hello! eyebrow piercing! plus, he's at a debate tourney. that's so shain. but seriously, who gets their eyebrow pierced? i suppose that was 1997 or whatever FUCK. we are old.

stewpid said...

debate tourney? ohhh, no, that's not dorky, not at all.

dmbmeg said...

Zang...!

Translation: Garth was way funnier than Wayne, but not funnier than the Deluise brother sitting in the back of the Pacer during the Bohemian Rhapsody scene.

CrimeNotes said...

I'm tough and difficult but a softie at heart. The Power Point is the side of growing up in the Midwest that The Hold Steady hasn't covered.

JebusHChrist said...

... and I'm covering a whole 'nother side of the Midwest. Arduoulsy.

CrimeNotes said...

Jebus -- Download The Hold Steady. Separation Sunday. It's your life's work set to music, only with more hard drugs.

Annie said...

Garth Algar = unsung hero. Of LIFE. I've been compared to him too.... and fully embrace it.

blythe said...

stew - just wait till this fall. shain and i will chronicle our high school debate judging tales in excrutiating details. you will either love it or not read it.

meg - choppin broccoli...

crimenotes - until today, i thought you were a well spoken cyborg, but now i know you have a place where your heart might be.

jebus - as long as it doesn't involve my mom, good for you. ok, even if it does.

crimenotes - last night, i was talking with a friend, lamenting the fact that the hold steady show has come and gone. i almost teared up. so, download away, jebus. i need someone else to talk endlessly about the wonder that is THS.

annie - we should totally start a facebook group.

blythe said...

oh, and matt - remember what my trophy said? "who needs a man?" since i was going to a womens college. years later, it has proven true, although, it's not really by choice as much as, well, i mean it's not my choice, clearly it's someone's choice - anyway. and that's all i remember about that party.

JebusHChrist said...

You guys, I love The Hold Steady.
So does momma bee.

blythe said...

oh dear. i suppose i asked for it.

JebusHChrist said...

So ...
nevermind.

Sorry, momma bee.

Matt said...

Yes, you did indeed go to a womens' college. Then, you left that place. And went to another womens' college. One might chide you, saying that you have to be around men (pl.) to be good with men.

But in the end it was just a stupid saying on a stupid trophy from some stupid high school juniors. I would have to kill a lot of people (14) for my "2nd sexiest man alive" trophy to be valid.