Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Cringesday: Middle School Melee

Hey there. Two contributions today. One from the venerable Von Trapper Keeper, Dan. And one from me. Because that's really why you're here. It's ok to admit. Ok, so YOUR TURN! Send it in! Seriously, I'm savings literally hundreds (of pennies) on therapy Pabst with this shit.

Fatbusters, the Herberg Middle School 6th grade nutrition quiz team, traveled 3 hours from Pittsfield, MA to Quincy Market in Boston in 1985 to compete in the State Finals. Named after the popular film Ghostbusters, the Fatbusters were well educated and competitive but faulty buzzers prevented them from claiming the crown. Team captain, Dan Nolan, who would later blog under the moniker of Von Trapper Keeper, performed admirably. Pictures with cardboard cutouts of the Boston Celtics and bags of candy from Faneuil Hall eased the agony of defeat and left the crew quite wound up for the long drive home.




Below, you will find a poem written as part of my eighth grade anthology created for Mrs. Knehans' English class. Not only does the poem suck (and is something I would write today), but the lamination and clip art are laughable. It was 1996. Didn't we have email and AOL by then?




This is pretty much what I looked like by the end of that fateful year. Check out those bangs! Hot! And, apparently, I wear my sunglasses at night just like any good child of the 80s. Nice American Eagle shirt B!

17 comments:

Dan said...

I have arrived. Picture in the bee-spot.

For the record, I was clearly much more of a dork than you in middle school.

blythe said...

middle school, now, yeah... for the record, i was on the challenge bowl team (quiz bowl). i also was in the chess club and did math olympiad every week. take that!

Mr. Shain said...

i think a whole week devoted to model un is in order.

JHC said...

I guess the Okie Blog Awards are over now. Sorry, suckers, but entries like this make her the best in the business*.


* not really sure what that business is

cvr said...

your poem sounds suspiciously like lyrics to a they might be giants song. are you sure you didn't take it from dial-a-song??

blythe said...

mr. shain - but of course! you're up, though. pictures? notes confiscated by pages? i do have some stories to tell... mostly the one about derek ott licking my foot. i'm still both perplexed and grossed out by that.

jebus - in the words of the carpenters, we've only just begun. you can vote till 9/26, so tell all your okies to send me some love. since it's the only kind i get.

cvr - it's quite possible, although, i don't know if i'd discovered dial a song at that point. i think i had. eh. make a little bird house in your soul.

Step Right Up said...

That poem sucks so bad it rocks! Great job! By the way, what kind of grade did you make on that?

5 of 9er said...

Admit it... you were wearing those sunglasses because you were on drugs. Drugs Drugs Drugs!

stew said...

what people don't realize is that you self-mutilated in order to write that poem. and it was SO worth it.

blythe said...

hey, how come no one is commenting on the super huge dork dan was/is? come on! fatbusters? buzzers? dude!

also, i take the silence about my poem aside from SRU means that i should probably be published.

Dan said...

They're just not familiar with the concept of "creepy VTK". Speaking of which, I thought I coined a new phrase this weekend, when I kept telling everyone that "creepy is the new sexy", but apparently it's been done. A google search indicates that there's even a card out there with that line. And it didn't get me laid so apparently creepy is not the new sexy. Maybe I need to bring back that periwinkle CB jacket I'm sporting in this picture. That'll work for sure.

Jeannette said...

Will you two fuck already?

Jeannette said...

And Dan, "creepy is the new cool" was totally a line I used on you. Didnt get me laid either.

JHC said...

um, I just realized that's you in the picture, b. I totally did not recognize you. I bet it's the eyebrows.

blythe said...

so, vtk, we gonna do this thing or what?

jhc, yeah, my eyebrows hadn't grown in yet. puberty...

Big Daddy said...

So it was a nutrition competition and you were rewarded with candy?

Ha ha.

Classic.

Dan said...

It might get creepy, bee-spot. think you can handle that?

That's right, big daddy. That's how we did back in the day of the four food groups.