Tuesday, December 23, 2008


I have a confession. I have serious asshole disease (SAD). I'm not sure where it all starts, maybe with holiday decorations going up at major retailers in August, or perhaps the 24 hour stream of Christmas muzak perpetrated by Magic 104.1 that started the day after T-day. Maybe it's because my blood sugar's been hijacked by 100 kinds of cookies and ribbon candies. Maybe it's because everyone I know is already done with work and I still have one more day to slog through (the least they could do is visit me, am I right? - See? Asshole!). It might be my mom (most definitely my mom - Shain reminded me of this time last year when she had called me with an emergency wrapping situation, which included schlepping across town at 10pm to buy envelopes to put gift cards in, things have not improved). It might be that my roommate finally got married, half moved out (conveniently forgot to clean his bathroom...), but took the cat. I miss having another living, breathing thing padding around the apartment when I'm all alone. Maybe it's the stinging cold that slaps you in the face then kicks you in the nuts every time you venture outside. It could be all the fucking reruns on TV. TV seasons are retarded. This isn't the southern hemisphere. Winter is when it's all cold and shit and you don't want to go outside, put some new shows on! It's possibly my static infused body. I could kill someone if I touch my fleece, hair, and the car door in the right order. It certainly doesn't help the my evening commute is in complete darkness. Sweet Jesus, I still have the Christmas cards I bought last year to send out. Maybe it's the constant flurry of irritating Facebook status messages detailing the various levels of holiday preparedness everyone feels the need to constantly report. Whatever it is makes me want to pool all my money set aside for gifts, buy an expensive bottle of scotch, order a Snuggie and hibernate till at least after New Years.

*I am currently tearing up at the last SATC epi when Big finds Carrie in the hotel in Paris, I'm not sure if this means I have emotions or am an even bigger asshole.

1 comment:

Michael5000 said...

Merry Christmas, Blythe!