Wednesday, May 27, 2009

When will I ever learn?

Probably never.

I have little to negative willpower. Unless you count forcing myself to sit through a Jon & Kate Plus 8 marathon, followed by The Real Housewives of New Bubbies, topped off by 12 new epidoes of TrueLife on MTV. In that case, I am the fucking willpower champion. But usually, I don't know my limits. It's always, one more, I'll just have one more. And then another after that. And then, well. Needless to say it's not pretty. Basically, I need help. If I have it anywhere around me, I'll mindlessly partake. Work. Home. Driving. Anything. And the consequences are always disastrous. What did Einstein say? Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result? Well, kids, surprise! I'm nuts.

Listen to your Auntie Blythe. JUST SAY NO!

No matter how good you think these colon bombs are, please, limit yourself. Turns out your body cannot actually handle 150 grams of fiber in one sitting. If you are going to hit it, though, oats and chocolate is by far the best flavor. I just hope you have a private bathroom at work or a sphincter of steel.

Too much?


BPD in OKC said...

You are not the only person that I've heard say that about those bars. I love the oats and chocolate ones. Luckily I've never had those kind of issues with them...

Matt A said...

Since when did you become Sarah Haskins?

SassyGirl said...

I have no willpower either, and when I'm bored, I eat. It is not good when you're home alone all day with nothing to do. I pretty much raid the pantry. Every day.
On the bright side, I seem to have sphincters of steel.

Jess said...

Oh no. I've never been tempted to eat more than one at a time. Thanks for being a cautionary tale, Blythe.

For some reason, I got a free box of the new mocha? flavor. Not good. So, now I have a almost full box sitting around. However, if I'm ever constipated, I can use them for medicinal purposes. Hooray!