Sundays are for Cracker Barrel

When you venture out on a weekend morning, I suggest you steer (literally) clear of any Cracker Barrels* in your area. They are dangerous places of death and destruction and I'm not just talking about cholesterol and race relations. The speed limit might say 40, but sure as shit every oldie wheeling their obsolete Buick into the parking lot will be racing along at 5, maybe 7. BEWARE.

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*I will never ever, even under duress, admit to immensely enjoying the hashbrown casserole. NEVER!