Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The one where I didn't get to go to ACL,

but the BF did. You can read his about it here. I stayed behind to slave away for the greater good. Boo.

Monday, September 22, 2008

a-hem

I have a big announcement to make. This is embarrassing, but is required as part of, you guessed it, a 12 step program for AA*. Here goes.

I DO NOT HAVE AN iPHONE.




*Apple Anonymous, obvs.

Friday, September 12, 2008

I'm so peternal, it hurts.

So, I think that instead of lady ovaries, I have lady dog ovaries. Seriously, I cannot watch that Sarah Mclaighskdjan ASPCA commercial without sobbing (I'm not kidding - do not look directly into their eyes!). I have to be dragged away from the open box full of wriggling puppies at the farmer's market. When I am sad and lonely, I log onto petfinder.com and get sadder and lonlier because none of those pups will be mine. It's not like I don't have (or have had) a dog. Claire is kickass in her own way, but belongs more to my parents now than me. There was also Zealand, who was tragically lost to BreakUp06. And yeah, this is probably not the best time to have a dog. I work 60 hours a week. My relationship is only a year old and probably isn't dogproof yet. My landlord kind of said no dogs in the lease. That said, I want a puppy, damnit! Clearly, I've forgotten all of the literal shit that goes along with raising a dog and what little assholes they can be. I've lost countless shoes and undergarments, but I still want one. Bad. So bad my heart hurts. Ouch.


I



Love

You,



Puppies!

Monday, September 08, 2008

I'm in love. Again.

It's been almost two years since my last relationship abruptly ended. During that time, I've moved from MA to the OK, upgraded from a Corolla to a Camry, worked for a candle conglomerate and a university, lived back with the 'rents and in my own place, all the while still unable to finish reading Salt, but that's neither here nor there. My relationship status has also run the gamut. I kind of went nuts there for a bit, seeking the company of whatever was new and exciting or around, then I settled into a relationship of convenience and even had a little fling at work. But, that's all in the past now, because I'm finally in love again. I honestly didn't think it would happen, that I was destined to long for what I had, knowing it was just out of reach. However, I'm happy to report that I'm no longer heartbroken and in a wonderful relationship. It's even better than what I remember.


This is me using the Photo Booth application on my brand new MacBook. Love at first site!

You complete me.

Saturday, September 06, 2008

A message from my Oklahoma relatives:



This is a small sampling of the forwards I receive daily. For some reason, my immediate family has decided to hide our political and religious leanings around the more conservative segments of the extended fam. I guess my parents don't want their parents and siblings to know that they've raised a couple of Godless, bleeding heart liberal children that are in favor of legalizing pot, prostitution, gay marriage and don't give a shit that John McCain was a POW. If I get one more email telling me that Obama is a Muslim, I'm telling all of my little cousins that Santa isn't real.

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

I hate 24 hour "news" channels.

Hurricanes schmuricanes. Gustav? Hannah? Ike? When Barack is the celebrity president, I hope he installs new heads over at the National Hurricane Center that use the wealth of bizarro baby names of celebs for future storms. I think Gustav might've gotten more coverage than the Jolie-Pitt twins, but barely.

Apple
Banjo
Coco
Diva Thin Muffin
Ella Bleu
Fifi Trixibelle
Georges I-VII
Hopper
I.P. Freely
Jermajesty
Kal-el
Losel
Moxie Crimefighter
Nayib
Ocean
Pilot Inspektor
Rocket
Sage Moonbloog
Tu
Willow
Violet
Yamma
Zuma Nesta