Some highlights in the friendship of Lacey and Blythe:
- We meet in second grade-ish. Love at first sight in Ms. Wilson's class. We learn to mutiply and divide. One of us excels at this. I will let you guess.
- Baton performances in school talent shows. We are awesome. Our outfits are even awesomer.
- Catholic camp nightmare (I am not Catholic, in fact, I am not anything - awkward!)
- I'm too cool for middle school and relegate Lacey to after school friend status in favor of Limited Too wearing Brookhavenites whose parents drove Explorers and went to Breckenridge to ski during spring break. This lasts for about two minutes until I realize I am a total tard with braces in honor choir.
- X-tina and I do all kinds of weird things to Lacey during 8th-9th grade. Not sure why. Did we think we were funny? We did glue quarters to pay phone banks. Ha.
- Lacey plays tennis in high school, I buy a racket and have a yearbook photo taken, but we manage to go to a few tournaments together. She is very tan. I am jealous.
- We bake a lot of weird cakes and make our brothers eat them.
- I make Lacey participate in endless videotaped pieces of shit productions including talk shows, musical, the contents of my closet, music videos with elaborate sets and costumes. Yes. We have a band. It started off as Nephilim, but was changed to String Bean Philp (not me! it was x-tina!). We have one unselling album. Laceys is a songstress of the highest degree. She can also play bongos. I, of course, played cello and shook a jar full of macaroni. We sing a song about a dolphin store.
- We are awkward around boys from 1997 until present.
- We go to school in MA, but not together. I visit her in Boston, though. We eat chicken fried steak at the Chili's in Copley and watch independent movies. I complain about BU's security. Funny story - on Lacey's 21st, we were at a bar/dancey place in Boston and I am propositioned for a threesome.
- We lose touch except for holidays when I become a dick and only spend time with the exbf's family (mistake # 4,762,994).
- But now, we are together again! Across the street in our childhood bedrooms.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LACEY!
Photo courtesy of x-tina.
You are one good BFF*, even if I'm not.
*I think "BFF" might be trademarked by Seventeen Magazine. Not sure.