Friday, September 29, 2006
Custom Road Sign
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
A series of news-search accidents lead us to this article and accompanying photo of "[h]ome improvement blogger, Bill Chapman, and his wife, Gay." Nothing against the Chapmans, or homes, or improvements, but this photo is really the last straw. Torturously posed photos of bloggers with laptops have become so common, so de rigueur, that we just roll over and accept them now. Bill Chapman is bloggin' right from that sawhorse! Lookit, he's bloggin' about drywall now. No more complacency. We want to assemble a gallery of these photos for public ridicule. Maybe we'll run a poll, or a contest, or just a hall of shame. Regardless, send your major media bloggers-with-laptops photos to firstname.lastname@example.org. Remember, we're looking for pose. Bloggers at conferences don't count, nor any other situation when the subject might actually be blogging. We want photos that bleed artifice, and we only want them from consequential media organizations or blogs associated with same.
Monday, September 25, 2006
|Your Life: The Soundtrack|
|Opening credits:||the lady is a tramp - frank sinatra|
|Waking up:||here comes the sun - the beatles|
|Average day:||you can't always get what you want - the stones|
|First date:||how come you don't call me anymore? - prince|
|Falling in love:||this is the first day of my life - bright eyes|
|Love scene:||give me a reason to love you - portishead|
|Fight scene:||mama said knock you out - ll cool j|
|Breaking up:||crooked teeth - death cab for cutie|
|Getting back together:||i want you back - jackson 5|
|Secret love:||secret heart - feist|
|Life's okay:||like humans do - talking heads|
|Mental breakdown:||breathe me - sia|
|Driving:||road - nick drake|
|Learning a lesson:||throw it all away - zero 7|
|Deep thought:||the district sleeps alone tonight - postal service|
|Flashback:||i am a rock - simon & garfunkle|
|Partying:||i just wanna love you - jay z|
|Happy dance:||push the little daisies - ween|
|Regreting:||i still haven't found what i'm looking for - u2|
|Long night alone:||kind of blue - miles davis|
|Death scene:||i will follow you into the dark - death cab for cutie|
|Closing credits:||i will - beatles|
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You've been totally Bzoink*d
Sunday, September 24, 2006
At a screening on Friday, at a casino in Goldsby, Okla., reporters were kept behind partitions. At another screening, at Cameron University on Thursday, Gibson showed up wearing a mask and wig. Not only that, but his Oklahoma-based publicist had said last week that the Oklahoma screenings had been cancelled -- probably to throw reporters off the scent. We all know the kinds of trouble Mel's been through lately, but he might be taking things to an extreme here. "Apocalypto," which is schduled for release on Dec. 8, is set in the last days of Mayan civilization in Mexico.
Monday, September 18, 2006
The Whole World Is Watching, and Ben Silverman Is Watching Back
Chuck Norris: The Defining Facts
*disclaimer: I did NOT make these up.
1. Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
2. Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
3. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
4. Chuck Norris does not have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway.
5. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
6. There are two kinds of people in this world: people who suck, and Chuck Norris.
7. Chuck Norris always has sex on the first date. Always.
8. Crop circles are Chuck Norris's way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down.
9. There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
10. When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
11. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
12. Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill.
13. Chuck Norris coined the phrase, "I could eat a Horse" after he ate every last unicorn in existence.
14. Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
15. Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass, at night.
16. It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
17. Chuck Norris is not lactose intolerant; he just refuses to put up with lactose's shit.
18. Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
19. When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
20. When Chuck Norris jumps into water, he doesnt get wet. The water gets Chuck Norrised.
p.s. chuck is an oklahoman.
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Wanted: Assistant for Stephen Hawking
ONDON, England (AP) -- Wanted: Bright graduate student to assist world-famous scientist. International travel, developing computer systems and dealing with the press required.
Renowned astrophysicist and best-selling author Stephen Hawking has announced he is looking for a graduate student to work for him for one to two years.
The mathematics professor at the University of Cambridge has done groundbreaking work on black holes and the origins of the universe, making him one of the best-known theoretical physicists of his generation.
The candidate can earn about £23,500 ($44,300) and would likely join Hawking on his many travels abroad, according to a job posting on the university's Web site. Planning lectures, maintaining computer, answering public inquiries and helping with scientific papers are a few of the responsibilities.
One purpose of the job was to aid the professor in areas which he has difficulty due to his disability, the posting said.
The 64-year-old scientist uses a wheelchair and communicates with the help of a computer because he suffers from a neurological disorder called amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, or Lou Gehrig's disease. He is almost completely paralyzed.
Chris Burgoyne, who has a bachelor's degree in mathematics at the University of Manchester, served as the professor's assistant from 1998-2000.
He said that during his 17 months working for Hawking he traveled to Berlin and several big cities in the United States including, Chicago, Atlanta, Boston and Washington, and met former President Bill Clinton. Expanding the professor's Web site was one of his main responsibilities.
"Flexibility, stamina and a confident and caring personality, together with a valid driving license, are essential for this demanding job," another advertisement said.
mimesis • \muh-MEE-sis\ • noun : imitation, mimicry
Example sentence:Late in her career, the painter became less interested in mimesis and began to experiment in styles of abstraction.
Did you know?"Mimesis" is a term with an undeniably classical pedigree. Originally a Greek word, it has been used in aesthetic or artistic theory to refer to the attempt to imitate or reproduce reality since Plato and Aristotle. "Mimesis" is derived from the Greek verb "mimeisthai," which means "to imitate" and which itself comes from "mimos," meaning "mime." The English word "mime" also descends from "mimos," as do "mimic" and "mimicry." And what about "mimeograph," the name of the duplicating machine that preceded the photocopier? We can't be absolutely certain what the folks at the A. B. Dick Company had in mind when they came up with "Mimeograph" (a trademark name that has since expired), but influence from "mimos" and its descendants certainly seems probable.
2. i am mortified by my high school poetry
3. no bananas left for breakfast
4. i admit it. i love steely dan.
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
|Sep 5, 2006 4:39 PM|| || |
Johnny wants to be your friend!
|Sep 5, 2006 9:24 AM|| || |
Girl Club USA wants to be your friend!
|Sep 5, 2006 8:59 AM|| || |
T.O.C. PROMOTIONS wants to be your friend!
|Sep 5, 2006 6:31 AM|| || |
The Claudia Malibu wants to be your friend!